Wednesday, May 11, 2022

Two Approaches to Dirty Laundry

This story captures two different approaches to the problems at Bethlehem.  I've left out names because I want to focus here on the two approaches rather than the specific people involved.  

In March 2021, two Bethlehem elders visited a small group.  We'll call them B (for Bethlehem College & Seminary, where he is still in a leadership role) and N (who is Not at Bethlehem anymore).

The people in the small group were asking questions about things happening at Bethlehem College & Seminary (BCS).  They had lots of questions and concerns (this was after multiple faculty and staff had resigned).  B and N fielded the questions.  But some of B's answers seemed kind of suspicious.  For instance, when B was asked about the spate of resignations from BCS, he answered with something like, "Well so-and-so is focused on social justice and is moving on to something else, and so-and-so wanted to move closer to family."  [In reality, the people who resigned did so because they saw deep and serious problems at BCS.]  And B continued, "and so-and-so feels called to Cameroon, and so-and-so is planning to retire soon."   [These departures were not relevant at all to what the small group was asking about, so it seems like a red herring.]  The small group asked about who paid for the legal investigation at BCS and didn't get a straight answer on that either.

After some minutes of this, N invited B to step into the hallway.  "B, what's going on?  Why don't you just tell them the truth?"  B: "What?  You want me to air that dirty laundry here?!"  N:  "Yes!  That's how it's going to get clean!"

This seems to capture two different approaches to the problems at Bethlehem and BCS.  One approach is to hide the dirty laundry, to put a good face on things, to keep the problems hidden, and to protect the reputation of the institutions.  But hiding problems just makes things worse, and lying about them breaks trust with people.

The other approach is to get the dirty laundry into the light and deal with it.  It's ugly.  It's going to be a beast to fix.  But sunlight is the best disinfectant.  And being honest about the problems builds trust with people.

I wish the elders would take the latter approach.  It stinks that there's dirty laundry in the first place, but far better to get it into the light, where it can get clean, than to let it fester.  The gospel frees us to get our sin into the light.  I wish the leaders at Bethlehem and at Bethlehem College & Seminary would embrace this truth at an institutional level. 

[Note:  Mickey rightly pointed out that there is a lot more that could be said here.  For this post, I'm focusing on the dirty laundry analogy and the stark contrast between the two approaches.  But I agree with him that this incident is deeply troubling for many reasons.]

3 comments:

  1. Three things come to mind when you talk about this approach.
    1.) This is a very Minnesotan way of handling a challenge. Not talking about it, pretending like it’s going to just go away if you don’t let it have air. What do the elders think will happen to the “dirty laundry” by keeping it a secret? 2.) You’re right, the lack of straight answers resulted in broken trust. But the lack of straight answers results in something else, it results in additional lies. The elders have to tell more lies about what has been happening and they dig a deeper hole for themselves. Then the next thing happens. 3.) When you deceive others, you start believing it yourself. You begin deceiving yourself and harden your heart or sear your conscience — and that is a very dangerous place for a person to be. That’s why Jesus referred to the Pharisees and “blind guides” they were still making the guideline and not realizing they couldn’t see the truth anymore. But for elders, teachers and pastors this is worse because they will have to give an account to God for how they lead.

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  2. Lies are much different than glossing over or Mn nice and given Bethlehems commitment to truth and the elders recommitting to transparency , is there still room for conversation and clarity? Or has too much trust been broken? Is there one or two you might trust? To start?

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    Replies
    1. Of course there's room for conversation and clarity. There's always time for repentance. I guess the question is, will there actually be truth-telling and repentance or will there be platitudes about reconciliation without actual action?

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